because, You.

what was that lovely hymn that flowed lightly through my untrained vocals this afternoon?
where was that touch that lifted my soul once again,
that call that beckoned me higher, closer to the God whom I gratefully call Father?

messy life - with prickly relationships, foggy visions and terribly-organised plans.

messy, tiring and full. but more often now, i catch a thought midway, turn it over and around, examine it like one would a strange object and then conclude that this must be what life feels like, this is real life. repeat it a hundred times a day, with happy thoughts and dark musings alike, and suddenly, i realise what a gift life is. and what a privilege to live it with the assurance of a God who never runs away, who never turns on me and who is constantly loving me. 

it makes me, in moments of clarity, want to give everything and do anything to make Him happy, to ask and to do the things that would bless His heart, make Him smile - in a tiny measure of my thanks.

but then He asked me, is it so difficult to believe that I can be pleased with you? 

and there wasn't an answer I could find inside.